I thought I would take some time to update you on my goings on. Specifically, from my post The Week That Was. My story is a mixed bag.
Fortunately, my wife landed with a new company on March 25. We were also able to get health insurance much sooner than we initially thought, April 1 to be exact.
This is all great news.
The other side of the coin is helping my wife navigate the change. I was truly struck by the "family spirit" that was her working group. They were and are very close. They encouraged one another, consoled one another, they behaved in a way that close families do. The sad reality is they're not a family. At least not in the eyes of corporate America. It reminded me how easy it is for organizations and their people to live in two different realities. One reality based on caring and performance, the other on results and a thing called money. Obviously, great danger follows these opposites.
Another striking result of this process is how little senior leaders know about communication. Specifically, how to say what needs to be said. If I didn't know any better, I would say a bunch of 3rd graders were running the show for my wife's former company and the new one too. If you're a professional, you're supposed act like one.
In the end, I'm looking out for my family and trusting in the One who knows and sees way more than I.
Many thanks for the concern and sentiments you've sent my way.
Does your organization (workplace, church, association) ask you to check your authentic self at the door?If you’re like many, the answer would be yes.Why do organizations value duplication and conformity?More than likely it’s because of insecurities gone wild.
Think about it, if you encounter someone who is different thinking or different looking, what is your fist inclination?Feel threatened?Humanly we feel better around those we think are like us.We look at it as a strange type of validation.Now look at the leaders of the corporations, churches and associations.More than likely these people suffer from the disease of insecurity…times ten.
I was that way.
The “story” has already been told regarding the impact of poor leadership, but now we’re getting the harvest from decades of bad influence.That harvest is manifesting itself in the form of a counter-genuine lifeforce.You know them, there the people who wear masks and “position” themselves in every conversation.These people really don’t know who they are.After years of working and living, it’s not surprising.
Lost and not sure of what to do.
Make your choice now, authenticity or a life of positioning.Remember, if you’re not authentic, you’re a fake.Long live the authentic.
This past week was definitely the week that was. It started with a call from my mom needing to be taken to a emergency care facility. It turned out to be nothing major, but I'll confess I saw ghosts. Ghosts from four years ago, when my deceased father was making seemingly "no big deal" visits to the ER.
As I'm sitting the waiting area for my mom, my wife calls and tells me company has filed Chapter 7 bankruptcy and the entire company shutdown. To add measure to this, no severance, ho healthcare (the company disbanded the group health plan prior to entering the bankruptcy), no job.
Ok, I was a little disappointed!
The irony is on two fronts for me:
I went though a similar experience in mid-December of last year. One of my entrepreneur pursuits was negatively impacted when a contract was terminated without warning. Again, game over! I have since regained footing with a local tech startup. You're probably thinking; "why take on more risk?" Part of my DNA.
I have experienced sudden change/loss in such a way that when I got my wife's news, it didn't cause me to drive off the road. I think the magical formula set in after my second goodbye encounter with corporate America. I am thankful for this and it has made me a better man, husband and dad.
Just so you know, we're (my family and I) are taking a hit from this situation. Don't want you thinking I'm Superman. There are things we've got to figure out and adjust to. Here's a few of the issues we're working through:
Thankfully, my wife got 2 job offers (in writing) in a matter of 48 hours. She'll be starting a new venture in the next week or so. The drawback is around healthcare. I've got to go without insurance for approx. 90 days, until the benefits kick-in again. As someone with Type I diabetes, I'm not thrilled, but I was able to secure coverage for my wife and kids during this interim period.
Change. Enough said.
Getting back money owed from a poster child organization for why sociopaths should only live in North Korea.
My daughter is not unlike other teens, she's fighting hard to establish her identity. I didn't always realize how much of a role I played in this. Culture at home, at school, at church, are the battlefields.
I only control the home front.
The implications can be daunting for the following:
Business doesn't really care how my daughter deals with the fight my daughter faces. Business wants to be my daughter, if not my master. You get me, it wants to be the center of everything. I'm thankful that I had a tough conversation with business letting it know who was master. It's still not easy.
American society is so full of it. On one hand it wants a good citizen, and on the other, it celebrates the very things that will lead to the opposite.
The school system is in denial. It believes that a world that no longer exists, still does. Ignoring all facts in-order to protect a status quo.
The American government is content with leaving my family and my daughter's future in financial ruin. Again, another form of denial in-order to protect a status quo.
I fight my own ghosts from so many years ago, but I am fighting. Maybe that leaves her inspired and assured.
As I parent, it occurred to me how much she needs me to be REAL. Not some guy who believes that words are not needed or touch is for a baby only. My daughter needs an example of what a REAL man is and is not. She needs my love, my attention and my touch.
BTW, this is so foreign to my history. Change is a great thing.