Worry In Life’s Classroom:
In my last post, there was only a title and a blank page. In a clever (so I thought) way I wanted to communicate that worry has taught me nothing. This is not entirely true.
In the end, worry has truly been a horrible teacher. If worry were a class, seminar or talk, I would go the other way. Alas, worry has been the cause of so much of my mental stress. I don’t like to think about how much of my lifetime has been sucked away by it.
In many ways worry is like fear, it must be managed. The discipline is a daily activity. Life happens and the elements are what they are. In the age of the Monkey Mind, so much comes at us. Here are some examples from my yesterday:
- My son’s physical condition is unstable again
- Did the audience get what I was writing
- Why is that issue such a big deal to them, when it’s not me
- Will the report reveal something I don’t want to know
- I feel like I’m being manipulated
I could go on, but I think you get it. So, how did I manage those animals. It’s a blend of preparation and in-the-moment actions. The preparation comes in slowing down, practicing mindfulness daily, seeking God’s face, and knowing that life is not supposed to be easy. The “in-the-moment” actions are born out of emotional intelligence. The understanding that not every emotion and thought is to be held on to. An active letting go is key here. Absent of these, I would be a wreck.
Everyone has difficulties at work, tensions at home, disappointing health news, are all going to happen. You should expect the what comes your way because it will. America is ripe of people trying to numb and medicate their way around. The numb and medicate approach only makes it worse, for you and those around you. We were designed to go through, not around our potential worries. If you mange your worries, you will lead to a contented life.
The Age of Fear
In many ways we live in an age where fear is the driving motivator for so many. It’s crippling, it’s debilitating, and I can fill in the blank with many other descriptors. I really believe that fear is the force that blocks us from coming to what is truly our destiny.
I met with the client yesterday whom I described the idea of why fear blocks.
Imagine if you’re brought to a place where there are five doors. And each of those five doors has your name written on it maybe even your destiny. The only thing is each of the five doors have a wild animal in the very front of it this wild animal appears to be there to protect that door and keep you away from it. In this case, the animal represents your fear. It is a block. However, the wild animal continues to rage and it seems like as every second goes by the raging becomes louder and louder. You then begin to take in all that surrounds you and you begin the self conversation that so many of us have. The conversation of; “can I trust that this is real. What if I make this decision to go forward and this animal tears me apart. I don’t think I want to do this.”
In each of these situations you’re confronted with a crossroads. Many people at this point move themselves to the other side and go on about their life. They go on with the drone economy. And the drone economy is truly a place where people just put their heads down. The name of the game is to do something over and over until the game is over. See the idea of retirement here. There will be two types of responses. You either go through and fight through that wild beast your fear, or you’ll turn around and travel the road that leads to regret. The reality is those five doors, and those wild animals, represent the essence of living. Mark Twain was right when he wrote; “The two most important days of your life are the day you were born, and the day you find out why.”
Destiny and Fear
Often times we are sold the idea that destiny can be grasped and kept in a neat little box. The reality is far from that. Destiny can be found, but it can’t be captured for our personal drives. Thankfully, it pulls and directs. In the end, this is something that every person will face.
In my own life right now I am facing the door that has a wild animal, and maybe the wildest animal I’ve ever encountered. I have decided that I’m going to go ahead and move forward and fight my fear. Fortunately for me, I’ve had the other five doors before. I understand the dynamic. The interesting thing is every fear is different. Every theory requires a different set of perseverance. So there’s no easy answer and there is no silver bullet. There is only the answer of going forward and moving to what you’re supposed to be, what you’re supposed to be doing.