{"id":154,"date":"2013-01-17T07:01:00","date_gmt":"2013-01-17T07:01:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/5-questions-with-dr-mark-goulston-and-dr-john-ullmen-authors-of-real-influence\/"},"modified":"2013-01-17T07:01:00","modified_gmt":"2013-01-17T07:01:00","slug":"5-questions-with-dr-mark-goulston-and-dr-john-ullmen-authors-of-real-influence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/5-questions-with-dr-mark-goulston-and-dr-john-ullmen-authors-of-real-influence\/","title":{"rendered":"5 Questions with Dr. Mark Goulston and Dr. John Ullmen, Authors of Real Influence"},"content":{"rendered":"

\n\"\"
<\/a>    
\nHad the pleasure of connecting with Dr. Mark Goulston<\/a> and Dr. John Ullmen<\/a>,
\nauthors of Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In<\/a>\"\"
\nabout their new book and more. Some really great insights from two great thought leaders. Enjoy!<\/p>\n

The book is
\nripe with practical ideas, could you unwrap the concept of "their
\nthere" and why it's important in the arena of influence?<\/strong>
\nMG: "Your here" is your agenda and in this distrustful world everyone
\nexpects people to have one and so everyone either has their guard up or is
\nprimed to put their guard up at the first sign of you trying to foist your
\nagenda on them.  <\/p>\n

JU: Focusing and remaining focused on "their there" or where the
\nother person is coming from and helping them to see and get to where they want
\nto go and way beyond that, where they could go is one of the keys to real
\ninfluence. In fact, the most influential people from our lives were influential
\nbecause they saw a potential in us that we couldn't see. <\/p>\n

We here in
\nthe U.S. live in a very self-focused culture. What are some ways to transcend
\nthis state?<\/strong>
MG: Think of someone and what they did who stood up for you when you couldn't
\nand\/or stood by you in a crisis and refused to let you fail and\/or stood up to
\nyou in private and pushed you to do something you didn't think you could or
\nstopped you from doing something foolish that would have hurt you or your
\nreputation.  <\/p>\n

JU: Good point Mark.  What was that
\nperson's effect on you? Probably amazing. 
\nWhat would be the best way to honor them? Probably by doing onto others
\nwhat they did onto you.  What would be
\nthe effect on people around you? Probably the same as that special person's
\neffect was on you… huge. Plus you might even like yourself or be proud of
\nyourself more. <\/p>\n

What will the
\nsolo\/individual contributor find most practical in the book?<\/strong>
JU: The solo\/individual will find a 4 step way to truly win friends and influence
\neveryone, that works 100 % of the time if you apply it. <\/p>\n

How does
\nlistening help our efforts to influence?<\/strong>
JU: Ask yourself, "When was the last time I felt someone: got my situation
\n(I mean really got my situation); got me in my situation (my fears, dread,
\ndreams and possibilities) and got not just where I wanted to be, but where I
\ncould be that would be profitable, successful, meaningful and fulfilling.
\n" We're guessing, "Doesn't happen to often."  That is the power of listening to influence
\nsomeone. <\/p>\n

Could someone
\napply the concepts found in the book to their personal lives?<\/strong>
MG: In a word… absolutely.  Just think
\nof the people who helped you become the best you could be and who will be among
\nthe top handful of people you are most grateful to at the end of your
\nlife.  What if you became that to the
\npeople in your personal life? Imagine the possibilities.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

About The Authors MARK GOULSTON, M.D., is a business psychiatrist,
\nconsultant, Chairman and Cofounder of Heartfelt Leadership, and the  author
\nof the bestselling Just Listen and Get Out Of Your Own Way.  He also
\nwrites a Tribune syndicated career column; blogs for Fast Company, Business
\nInsider, Huffington Post, and Psychology Today<\/a>; and is featured frequently in
\nmajor media, including the Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review<\/a>,
\nFortune, Newsweek, CNN, NPR, and Fox News. He lives in Los Angeles.  JOHN
\nULLMEN, Ph.D., is an acclaimed executive coach whose clients include dozens of
\nleading international firms.  He oversees MotivationRules.com, conducts
\npopular feedback-based seminars on influence in organizations, and teaches at
\nthe UCLA Anderson School of Management<\/a>.  He lives in Los Angeles.<\/p>\n

\nRelated articles<\/legend>\n
\n
\"\"<\/a>The Legacy Cliff: A Guest Post by Dr. Andrew Thorn<\/a><\/div>\n
\"\"<\/a>Entrepreneurs Learn New Rules for Real Influence<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/fieldset>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Had the pleasure of connecting with Dr. Mark Goulston and Dr. John Ullmen, authors of Real Influence: Persuade Without Pushing and Gain Without Giving In about their new book and more. Some really great insights from two great thought leaders. Enjoy!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,18,123,6],"tags":[200,30,499,501,503,336,502,500,504,505],"class_list":["post-154","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-books","category-business-commentary","category-leadership-development","category-learning","tag-5-questions","tag-books-2","tag-influence","tag-interview","tag-john-ullmen","tag-leadership","tag-mark-goulston","tag-questions","tag-real-influence","tag-ucla-anderson-school-of-business"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/154","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=154"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/154\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=154"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=154"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.epicliving.com\/epic\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=154"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}