Learning Archives - Page 13 of 39

What’s Wrong with the Status Quo?

9 May 2013May 9, 2013Eric

One of our greatest enemies, from a 2012 post.

So what's wrong with the status quo? A lot, when it comes to problems that continue to get worse.

For the purposes of getting to the heart of things, here's the definition of "status quo" from the Merriam-Webster's Dictionary:

The existing state of affairs (seeks to preserve the status quo)

I'll use my own experience to set some context and you can apply my example to anything you like.

About 25 years ago I persecuted my dad in-person and alone. I was angry for what was done and for what was missing. I waged this case on what seemed like a daily basis. I protested, I lied, I ignored, and I was silently cruel.

At a point, a few years into my marriage, my wife asked me if I realized how distant and cruel I became when I was around my father. I denied it, I defended myself and I felt exposed. How could she know my secret, my wound, my war? I decided to prosecute on.

The existing state of affairs (seeks to preserve the status quo)

You might wonder why I wouldn't make the choice to change, to turn it around, to forgive. I'm sure there are multiple reasons why, but certainly I felt more comfortable in the prosecution's case. I fooled myself into believing that my existing state would deliver an outcome I thought was right. Little did I know how wrong I was.

Many years on, my case rested and the charges were dismissed. I forgave and got a few years of peace and freedom before he passed. I actually found a man I liked and certainly loved. I do, at times, wish I would have come to my senses or figured out that it Really is better to forgive.

Are you tracking with me? Can you see the danger in sticking with the status quo?

Think about this:

The status quo fools you into believing that all is well, regardless of the problems looking right at you.
The status quo demands you lie and defend.
The status quo assures you saftey and a future you won't have to deal with.
The status quo accuses (loudly) reformers of betrayal and madness.
The status quo uses fear to keep you in place.

Building and Managing Trust

8 May 2013May 8, 2013Eric

In one of the new ventures I'm working on, I've been brought on to help on multiple fronts. The company is a startup and that implies variety. The biggest job for me, however, is building and managing trust.

I never take this for granted. You shouldn't forget this either.

Building trust comes from a desire to show that you're worth trusting. It can be manifested in your words, but as the saying goes, actions speak louder than words. If you have a relationship with a smart, actively engaged person, then you should expect that your words and actions will be observed for the purposes of building trust. I highly recommend you pay as much attention as possible here because more than likely the person observing you has been burned before.

Everyone been burned before.

Managing trust is the art of gratitude toward the one who has given the trust. When trust is given don't feel like you've arrived and begin to think autopilot is the order of the day. Complacency is sure way to lose everything you've built. I practice on purpose management. For example, what actions am I taking today that enhance or hinder. Ask these questions everyday.

Think of building and managing trust as a form of gardening. Build something beautiful and then keep the weeds out.

The Value of a Degree

1 May 2013May 1, 2013Eric

This article appeared in this past weekend's Wall Street Journal. It focuses on the value of a degree in today's social and economic climate.

I've looked at this issue for many years. I've done this through the lens of an individual and a parent. Certainly, there are arguments to be made on both sides. I tend to favor the disruption going on now. It could lead to something very positive.

There is one thing I'm watching that doesn't get touched on in the article, and that is how much debt many universities are carrying on their balance sheets. It speaks to some of the creeping ills facing higher education. Mark Cuban wrote a fabulous post on the subject here.

Keep an eye on all of these trends. You'll be glad you did.

Knowing Your Limits

29 April 2013April 29, 2013Eric

This post is from back in 2008. We'll need this in the future to come.

The above insignia is for the U.S. Navy Seals. I didn't realize how significant the symbol was until I talked to Erik, whose brother is a Navy Seal.

Erik and I didn't talk much about war or fighting, but we did talk about knowing your limits.

The Seals go through very difficult training in the pursuit of becoming elite. A part of that training is discovering your limits. My understanding is when a Seal discovers their limits they are better prepared for the extreme situations inevitable in their job. Some say enlightenment arrives as well with a discovery of one's limits. I would agree.

So how about you? Have you discovered, and do you know your limits?

In years past I didn't want to know. I thought knowing my limits would bring me too close to the "brink." So many times I chose the expedient and practical The brink is good for you though. I say this, knowing how painful it can be. No one signs up for it (except maybe the Navy Seals) and many times we just want a break.

Here are some ideas around discovering and knowing your limits:

When the storms (business drop-off, health issues, job loss, relationship troubles) come, stop. You're heading into a time of discovering your limits. Ironically, the choice is yours as to the staying and fighting. You could choose an easy route to escape, and many do.
Focus on what is being produced inside of you. This is a future-forward perspective. In other words, a seed is planted, but you don't see the fruit for some time to come. You have to believe.
Prepare for people to desert you. It's not personal, but it is true. Limits are markers for what many people see as dangerous, frightening or pure madness. When you find someone willing to stick with you during your discovery and knowing, you've found someone you can count on.
Don't get bitter or resentful over anything.
Don't be too hard on yourself when the mistakes are made. Mistakes are a part of the process.

The Navy Seals are an elite group of people. They've set a good example of what we all should be willing to do in our career, relationships, health and dreams.

Discover and know your limits.

Education Revolution From Sir Ken Robinson

19 April 2013April 19, 2013Eric

This post is from a few years back and just as relevant. Thanks goes out to my friend Andy for prompting me.

There is no doubt in my mind that Sir Ken Robinson get's "it" when it pertains to our education system. He does an excellent job in the below speech exposing many lies. Tough road ahead for change.

Can You Spare 3 Minutes?

18 April 2013April 18, 2013Eric

I noticed (paid attention to) my kids and their screens this morning. I, like many, am challenged by what's acceptable for screen time in my home. Apple, Facebook and Google are just a few of the contenders for attention. Their business models are rooted deeply in this.

My post today is not so much about social media, as it is about what we spend our time on in a given day (given is a keyword here). We all have been given 1,440 minutes in each day.

Can you spare 3 minutes?

Sparing 3 minutes is a starting point. It's a starting point for you to discover how much a gift time is and maybe how much time you're wasting on the pursuits that, in the end, won't amount to much.

So what should you do with 3 minutes? Here's a suggestive list:

Take in nature. Right now, where I'm at, nature is sending a love letter to the senses.
Turn off the screens and do nothing.
Look at people and consider where they may be at.
Count all that is going right in your life.
Tell someone you love them-on purpose.

Now go do this every day. You'll still have 1,437 minutes leftover. Who knows, maybe that 3 minutes you spared will grow.

We Don’t Need Anymore Actors

13 April 2013April 13, 2013Eric

I'm doing more and more everyday to keep things real with everyone I encounter. This is significant because I'm a recovering actor.

We don't need anymore actors.

Keeping things real now is not such a chore for me now. Occasionally, I'll have an adviser alert me if my writing or speaking is sounding too "corportese" or "suit-like." Nothing against the corporate soldiers, it's just people have enough of that coming at them already.

Maybe it's just too terrifying for some to be who they are. Like the child at recess who feels awkward about asking to join in the game, due to the rejection of the herd previously. Or the adult sitting in the team meeting feeling embarrassed because their boss personally made them an example of what is frowned upon. If I had the ability, I would be right by their sides telling them:

"It's not you! There's nothing wrong with you."

The difficulty in keeping things real is becoming almost epidemic in my country. I mean, let's face it, many worship actors, entertainers, showmen, and celebrities. The lines of what is real and what is not have been blurred. I can understand why you might find it difficult to be who you really are.

The following is a question that came to me about 10 years ago. It stopped me cold when it landed in my ears, went to my mind and settled in my heart:

"Eric, are you really Eric or are you a representative of him?"

We don't need anymore actors. The problems we face, and will face, tell me we're going to need those who are real. People who are humble, wise and unafraid. The actors are only thinking of themselves. Believe me I know from personal experience. They really are not interested in you, just what is yours.

If you find yourself in the actor's camp today, you can look at me as an example of how one person can change. It's worth it.

The Unraveling

11 April 2013April 11, 2013Eric

Looking around you and your own life, do you see the unraveling?

We are like these garments that over time begin the process of unraveling. As years unfurl this is inevitable. It's not all bad because we can always do something about it. See a thread here, see a patch there, and all you have to do is start the repair.

I wonder how many people realize the unraveling is happening.

Unraveling rarely appears as a sudden tear. It's a slow process. Very slow…

An Update

29 March 2013March 29, 2013Eric

I thought I would take some time to update you on my goings on. Specifically, from my post The Week That Was. My story is a mixed bag.

Fortunately, my wife landed with a new company on March 25. We were also able to get health insurance much sooner than we initially thought, April 1 to be exact.

This is all great news.

The other side of the coin is helping my wife navigate the change. I was truly struck by the "family spirit" that was her working group. They were and are very close. They encouraged one another, consoled one another, they behaved in a way that close families do. The sad reality is they're not a family. At least not in the eyes of corporate America. It reminded me how easy it is for organizations and their people to live in two different realities. One reality based on caring and performance, the other on results and a thing called money. Obviously, great danger follows these opposites.

Another striking result of this process is how little senior leaders know about communication. Specifically, how to say what needs to be said. If I didn't know any better, I would say a bunch of 3rd graders were running the show for my wife's former company and the new one too. If you're a professional, you're supposed act like one.

In the end, I'm looking out for my family and trusting in the One who knows and sees way more than I.

Many thanks for the concern and sentiments you've sent my way.