So, what’s your measuring stick for people? Do they need to be a certain color? Do they need to drive a certain vehicle? Do they need to have a certain type of degree?
I suppose human bias is a fact of being human. It’s in us and there’s no way around it. But like emotions it’s not good or bad, just what we do with it. I’m biased toward positive people and I also know that it’s not always possible to be around them 100% of the time. The discipline I need is life management. Life management teaches me the art of dealing with each situation as it comes my way.
If the people you meet, or have known for some time, have to meet a vague mental checklist, you’re in trouble. Bigotry, arrogance and stunted mental growth are formed out of this approach. Insecurity is the culprit for those using a measuring stick that excludes certain types of people. When we deal with our insecurities, we begin to see people from a different set of lenses.
The best measuring stick is the unconditional one. Unconditional allows you to embrace real diversity and not lose your own identity in the process.
The choice is yours.
Ever created a list of hope? I think everyone has at one time or another. Even if you didn’t write it down, you probably held it in your head. As with every list, there is the potential for losing it.
You don’t want to lose the list of hope.
The importance of hope is an obvious one. Hope is to the human being, what gas or electricity is to a car. You need it to get to where you’re going. Hope is a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day, a star in a dark night sky. I know you understand this.
Everyone has heard and read the stories of late. The ones of people who couldn’t fend off the despair. If you find yourself in that place reach out for help. My post is not my attempt to solve the issue of suicide or give insights into its roots. I want to start in a place where losing hope can be all too common. The place is where things are somewhat stable to good. Regardless of where you may find yourself, I want to give some encouragement around the list of hope.
I have a list that looks like this:
Your list can look like mine or something radically different. The key is creating the list. In the words of the writer:
“All of us get lost in the darkness, dreamers learn to steer by the stars.” – Neil Peart
My reasons for having the list of hope is having a document I can go to when I lose hope. The list is something tangible to remind me of what’s important. There are times (reoccurring) when I need to pull this list out to refresh, reframe and keep going.
I’m here if you need me, reach out if I can help in a bigger way.
I gave a talk recently to a group of students at Tech Elevator. Soon I’ll have some footage for you, but this post is about perspective. The kind of perspective found in pouring out into those students in a way that left me in awe. When you look back on what you’ve learned, and what makes you thankful, it leaves you humble. Here’s a conclusion I came to today:
If I achieve nothing else from this point forward, I have learned and been blessed in a way that is beyond what I could have expected.
During the talk with those students, I helped them with a process of looking back for perspective. It was designed to give them reference points for a tough journey ahead. Often, we go into storms with no account of what we can handle. It’s as if we just react to whatever comes our way. Sometimes this works out, sometimes we’re left exposed. Please understand:
Storms are as normal, and frequent, as sun and good times.
Here are some key opportunities you can take away from looking back for perspective:
Reach out to me directly if you would like more.
The post in italics below was originally written in 2009. I recall that year as being a tough one. As of late, I’ve been recalling the words from 2009. Some of the areas from that time have resolved and some are ongoing. I know the importance of my preparation and response. Both of those are key when faced with the good and bad of life.
In my current frame, I am faced with:
My alignment with God’s call and my growth in EQ have added to my sustainment and happiness. Again, this is about preparation and responding as life delivers what it delivers.
“There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”
As I wrote some time ago, I have been doing more thinking than writing lately. One of the things I’ve been pondering is the idea of what one wants from life-specifically what I’ve wanted.
I’ve also been thinking about what I’ve gotten, and what I did in response to the result.
The following are some specifics:
How much do you invest in your life? How much time and money do you spend on life?
It has been said that Lebron James spends over seven figures on his physical health. Not astounding, considering the shape he’s in and the amount of money he makes. In the end, it’s a lot of money. His physical life must be important to him.
How about you?
First, don’t make the mistake of thinking that only the rich and famous can invest in their lives. Everything, is relative, for the rich and the poor. What matters is your commitment to life. This really is about mindset and what you choose to do. Every successful person knows this. What is ironic, at least in America, is we put little value on life. This is further compounded by our over-valuing of money, celebrity, physical appearance, career, and more. Don’t get me wrong, most talk a good game, but the numbers don’t lie. We’re advancing in areas that are, on the face, good. But we’re retreating in the areas of life that are vital.
Considering that life is a limited-time offer, you would think we’d “get after it.” Maybe we really have bought the ocean-front property in Wyoming. I hope you will consider investing more of your resources in your life. Maybe like:
If you need more clarity on the above examples, reach out to me.
I wrote this almost 4 years ago. My passage has changed, but this is still a relevant topic for many.
“Eric, as a friend and colleague I have witnessed the roller coaster ride you have had over the past number of years —a ride that has provided you with great information on many levels. Your life’s work has been more clearly defined for you as you experienced the passages that accompany authenticity, clarity and openness to the world. Purpose, Passion and Paycheck are a great combo if you can make it happen. For me the road, passage to this desire has been filled with the “moving ahead sideways” effect. I think I have finally found the combo in perfect combination. What I can tell you is that for me—it was my friends, mentors, coaches and a spiritual advisor who helped me the most. I moved from intellectually actualizing to a deeper and more satisfying place of authenticity about who I really am —this led to life being easier—and with that the choices became clear. I wish you the best in your continual pursuit—and hope you can find peace with all of this.”
The above note came my way a couple of weeks ago. I’ve held onto it tightly. It is informing my passage to the new.
Where we’re at now, at least in the American culture, most things are measured by winning and losing. I guess it’s no surprise that we worship competitive sports. The winning and losing I’m referring to is related to material and visual success. I, like many, fell for the deception of how many likes, how many followers, how many page views, and the biggest of them all, how’s your business doing.
The crazy part for me is found in the initial motivation for doing what I do. I didn’t start Epic Living as a vehicle for a great business venture. I was motivated to reach people and introduce them to their Epic life. That’s it, still is.
Somewhere along the way, I got off track.
In this world we have the realities of bills, family needs, and work in general. It’s just the way it is. I started to demanding Epic Living to be what it couldn’t be. I started being the old corporate sales guy who knew how to create major ROI. Some may say, why not? Well, GM sales a lot of cars, but that doesn’t mean they’re any good. Understand me clearly, making money on your art is not wrong or bad. The problem arises when it needs marketing to breathe and survive. I speak from my experience only here.
So what to do? I’ve slowly been moving toward a different mindset and model. The one from the beginning. It may mean separating what I do for money from what I do as a mission. That will be hard. I’m finally at peace with going with the current, instead of fighting it. In the end, I know what I’ve been called to do. Didn’t always do a good job at embracing it, but I understand now.
The passage for me is found in 2 things: